I take super hot showers because I like to practice burning in hell
- Douche: hey
- Nice girl:
- Douche: HEY
- Nice girl: what?
- Douche: you know, there should be a warning sign on my dick
- Nice girl: excuse me?
- Douche: yeah, it should say choking hazard lol *hi fives bros*
- Nice girl: isn't that a label they put on small objects?
“JENSEN. JENSEN, I CAN’T SEE! JEN. JEEEEEEEEN. JEN YOU NEED TO HELP ME I CAN’T SEE I DON’T KNOW WHAT’S HAPPENING OH GOD I’M SCARED WHAT IF I’M BLIND AND CAN NEVER SEE AGAIN OH MY GOD OH MY GOD.”
“Jared, you just have some stuff on your face. Take it off.”
“IT’S DARK, JENSEN. IT’S DARK AND I DON’T LIKE IT.”
“Jared all you ne—”
“DARK, JENSEN! DARK.”
“IT WAS LIGHT, BUT NOW IT’S DARK.”
Behold my minions, the Hiddleston Eye Fuck. Leave your panties at the door.I just made the most inhumane noise.
Who wouldn’t eye fuck Kat Dennings?
i say god damn
I love this because this is the most gentlemanly gentleman of all the gentlemen and he’s still like “Damn, girl.”